Saturday, February 12, 2005

The Inner Light

Sometimes we looked at a person we see the face to be full of light. A beauty that is not based on physical looks but something that you feel and transcend beyond the flesh. You can feel calm and peace when this person is around. That is something not every pretty face possess.

Seeing a person like this is not that often specially among adults. When domestic chaos is very common and financial problems seems to be making life even harder. Somehow the person who possess this quality despite the difficulties manage to manifest the light.

An aura that will warm your soul and consciousnes. The feeling of calm and inner peace is felt. The mere presence of the person makes you smile. It is more than having a lover or someone you love right beside you, the feeling is a universal emotion that embraces all the goodness of life.

Reminding me one night, when I was in a difficult moment. I was worrying so much that prayer seems to be the only hope. Grace is what I needed at that time, nothing more will be enough to make me feel with ease. I prayed hard enough and opened the bible saw there the name of an angel Raphael. Out of nowhere I prayed and meditated on the angel's nice story in the old book. Raphael is a healer,so, I asked him to heal what is troubling me show me a sign that God heard my prayer.

I was in bed at that time, having some difficult moment with a lot of things and a fever. When all of a sudden I felt, the left part of my bed was submerged. As if someone was seated. I opened my eyes and saw a very bright light. An illumination that was unexplainable. At that moment I felt a different sense of peace and calm. Something so divine and pure, it was a moment I can not forget. I saw a pure being in light,seated beside me. In a short moment, I thank angel Raphael for visiting me.I knew it was him, for he was holding a small sling bag and a fish. Exactly how the old book describe how he healed and showed compassion to a person. My small room was filled with light.Then I closed my eyes, it was gone. That night I felt peace and assurance that my prayers are heard.
I knew it was not a dream because no imagination or human sense can duplicate that feeling.It was definitely sublime.

Even among people,we sometimes feel the presence of people with an inner light personality. Recently, I visited my home country. I met new friends and one lady was seated from a distance. I knew the minute I entered the room,that there is someone in the room with that personality. Then as I approached her, the light is felt and even without looking straight to her, I knew she was the one. A person's goodness is sometimes felt specially the one with pure intentions and heart. You do not need to be an angel or a saint. Sometimes, a person's aura is felt right at that moment when you are sensitive enough to feel it.

I know it occured to you before that a person seems to have the personality that is so light, it makes you feel at ease and happy when you are around with that person. Not having any emotional relations or having a sexual relations, it is just a pure friendship or sometimes just an ordinary acquiantance. Deep inside you feel the person's aura all throughout the goodness is felt deep in our soul. No need for some extra powers to feel it , as human we can feel it. The divinity of a human soul is something we can all feel. Just what I felt, the feeling is always heaven.


That Girl I Will Always Like....The Girl...

When I first saw her, she is indeed a pretty lady. I told our common friend that she looks like my ex-girlfriend. In height and body.

As I get to know her,she was some kinda-yo..know kinda..see like ah...kinda ...talkative and her talk seems to be centered only to a certain personality-Her OWN. I feel this girl does not like me. I can also feel this girl seems to be ignoring me,probably it was just one of those first meeting thing.Nevertheless,live as I would have always. To exist with everyone,regardless of what they think about me,because I never think about them too. So,I just live my life as I would.

I grew up in a very diverse society. My childhood friends are from families you would actually know by just looking at your twenty peso bill or if you cross some streets with street names that happens to be their relative or grandparents. For some of my friends, you do not have to know their last name , but the product you are holding could have been from their factory. As for me, our family is just another story of
failed business families losing a lot in the past.I do not care at all, I never felt that royalty.I was a third generation at that time grand royalty was not a staple activity or a word in the family. We conduct our lives in the most modest way.Among my childhood friends even when we got a little older you will never hear them say a thing about what they have nor what their friends have. All you hear from them was our lives at that moment and what opportunity to tackle. Which a point I adore about my childhood friends.

This cute girl has a lot of strong points. Strong points in a way, that would sometimes be a nuissance or sometimes really cute.As I am a master of difficult situation and personalities, I just have to hold on the fact that this girl has something good.Just like everyone else. Who on this planet does not have negative points. We live in a not so perfect world. Even the girl I will always like got some bad side.

At one point, I knew that this girl was saying something about me while we were in a train. I pretended that was something beyond my linguistic comprehension. I can hear her,loud and clear and ignore what I heard in slang of their own. I felt bad but had to continue,without being affected. I knew sooner I will have my day. That night also, I knew what triggers it. I just smile everytime I remember it. Friends here gave me a new nickname. She keeps on insisting that came from the fact that I was slow, I kept telling her that nickname came from my talent in imitating a cartoon character. Funny, how this girl will argue endlessly.I felt at one point not once or twice this girl looked at me as if I was ignorant and senseless homo sapien.I just continue to ignore her because I carried a scholarship, a masteral units, awards etc.,pardon me on how I sound but I wanted to point that I have more to offer. I do not want to sound this way To cut it short...As always I understand her because she is the girl I will always like even if we argue and even when she looked at me as someone so small.I still like her.

Not so soon or I just can not remember the day when, I begin to treat this girl like another case study. Well, that is the appropriate term to call it or just a term I used to aptly describe difficult personalities. I treated her with the deepest understanding that she grew up with that notion and attitude that no one on this planet will ever change her. As we get closer, I think the habit of arguing with her seems to be a way to make her realized that I am a friend who wants to be sincere. I guess- sincere is the right word that made me unique compared with her other friends. I am sure at one point she felt that some of her friends seems to be avoiding her or going away from her. Those things happen to people ,we just have to become sensitive to feel it. Comprehend it well and realize what was happening. I can assure her from now on, when she needs me,she will have me at anytime.That girl will have me because I am the person who will always like this girl.

Talk about patience. I have tons of it and millions still in a giant vault. That is why right after we argue, we are okay again.I just have to pull out some of the stored patience in my vault when it becomes so intense. After we argue,I still like her. For the simple reason, I understand who she is-although not completely, somehow what I have been thru and how I dealt with a lot of people in the past prepared me to be a capable person to relate to her. Since,I can relate to her well and the chemistry is already there,I will always like that girl.

Sometimes it is exhausting to be with her or by just listening to her. That is just how she is. Something of a talent and her character. It will be a different person when you do not hear her voice.She makes money out of that ability and makes the company proud of her. It is worth liking this girl you can be proud of her sometimes.

I really do not know when it dawned on me that I will never ever leave this girl and will always be there for her- protect her, be a friend to her and be with her when she needed me. I just do not remember when but up to this writing I am keeping that promise.That girl I will always like ...the girl that means a lot to me.

After our Bangkok trip I heard her say ;"thanks for the patience and understanding". It was my first time to hear those words from her,usually just a simple thank you. That second while I was at their gate and she was at their door looking back at me,I can not believe what I heard.I was suprised. It was a time when all that patience, all that effort, all that caring , all that understanding,all that difficult times,all that love that I extended unselfishly was suddenly paid in that instance.

I knew this girl has the sweet side and this girl is really worth keeping.No one will ever harm her neither she will feel alone . I will be there for her always, even if takes my life. That girl I will always like....The girl that I will protect..That girl I will always understand as much as she understand me now..The girl that I care so much.The girl, who means a lot to me. The girl who loves ice cream.That girl is important to me. I will protect her and will never ever leave her in pain or in trouble.

We can even share the same faith if she wants.I know you will read this, the story is told in the most honest and sincerest manner. I do not want to lie to you anymore. I can not continue saying that I will be there for you if I can not be sincere. This girl will always be in my mind and be thinking how she is at this time. Without asking anything in return, I will be with the Girl I will always like anytime.I would not call her a case study anymore because she does not challenge my patience anymore, I am use to her presence now.Better if I call her my Friend.

Ok, time to argue again hahahaha.Remember, I am here.